|
The Pains of Reputation
Last post Sat, Aug 30 2008 2:06 PM by Shaden. 10 replies.
-
Thu, May 8 2008 4:50 PM
|
|
-
Shaden
 
 - Joined on Sun, Dec 30 2007
- Hell on Earth...
 - Points 3,977
|
Author's Note: This is a small freewriting style oneshot I whipped up out of the blue. Not really sure what inspired it - and since it has no real pre-panning or plot it may make little sense. I'm not sure - probably just my perfectionist attitude, but whatever. Its a journal-esque style from a Zambrano warrior and several events with an ending of course. I hope you enjoy it. Rated T due to language and suggestive themes. (In other words, if this offends you, just don't read my story.)
The Pains of Reputation
A Zambranos’ Tale
-
Written by Robert W.
[ Shaden ] My mother always told me I’d one day be a great warrior and my name would become a legend, just as my fathers’. I always believed this as a little girl, even well into my teen years. At twenty, after sixteen years of rigorous training, I left my home to an encampment in the far-off Aberas jungles, where I’d join up with a defense force in charge of diverting attacks off of nearby trade posts along the roadways. At first I was excited; I was living my dream finally! I was going to fight in the constant war and I’d live up to my mothers expectations. I’d become a great warrior and make her proud.
-----
I was picked up at my home by caravan at sunrise; the man who I’d soon learn was my commanding officer told me to only bring my clothes, nothing else. I left that morning with a simple farewell and ‘I love you’ to my mother. The man and I sat in the back of the caravan and rode off towards Aberas. It was a long two-day trip and we got to know each other fairly well during that time.
Burley, as I quickly learned, was his name and he was the second-in-command of the Aberas platoon. I’d be part of a 24-man group. He gave me my new weapons and armor during the ride; a Ruglar Rifle (standard military arms), a Filigree pistol, steel shoulder plates, a leather sash, and a case of Uriel Slugs for my weapons. The gear was much better than what I’d had at home, and the new feel of it was so great in my hands. Already I loved this whole military business.
I arrived at the encampment during the evening meal that night. As I hopped off the caravan, Burley pointed me towards the chef and said I could eat wherever. Then he pointed out a tent which looked unused in the far corner; that was going to be my home. I was pretty nervous; the camp was filled with cheerful soldiers, all of them men. I put on a straight face, made sure all my gear was in check, and walked nonchalantly over to the chef. I knew the soldiers were looking at me because the camp quieted down as I made my way around.
I remember hearing them whisper, “Look at that one, I bet I score it with her by tomorrow,” and, “What are they thinking sending a girl in the military, this is a man’s world.” I shrugged the comments off and brushed my hand across my Filigree, sliding a bullet into place. I’d have to prove myself to these assholes that I was more than an average woman, probably. If it meant taking one of them down, whether it is by my hands or a bullet, I would do it.
I ate alone in my tent that night, polishing my equipment ‘till the officers called for lights out. I slept light my first night, the eerie sounds off the Aberas keeping me on alert constantly. Adjusting to this new lifestyle was going to be a pain, but interesting none-the-less.
The next morning, I attended breakfast and ate near the chef. We chatted a bit, talked about our families and life outside the military. He was a nice fellow, came from far away and was only here respected because he chose who got the best food. At least I’d made another friend in this place - although I’m not sure I can consider my officer a friend.
After breakfast, roll was called, and then we were split into our squads and sent directly to patrolling the paths. Burely and the first-commander met me that morning and showed me where I’d be positioned and introduced me to the other soldiers. Things got interesting that day, and I earned a lot of respect in the camp… I remember it so vividly.
“Men, this is Carmen. She’ll be the newest member to this squadron. I expect you’ll treat her as any one of your peers, so don’t let me catch any of you starting up trouble,” he’d said with a commanding voice. The men saluted him, but as soon as he walked over to another squad, several of the men whined and cursed aloud that they had the ‘girl’ on their team.
One of the men, probably the guy thinking he was a ‘leader’ around here, walked up to me that morning and put his hand on my knee, sliding upwards slowly. “Listen ***, the only thing you’ll be doing out here is making it more enjoyable for us to do our job. Let’s just make sure we get that straight,” he whispered in my ear.
My heart was beating rapidly now and my throat was dry. I was going to give in and just let them have me, to do whatever, just to keep from getting in trouble on my first day. From disappointing my mother. I’m glad I didn’t though. Instead, I pushed his hand off and told him to back off. I felt pretty confident, though my voice was shaky so the men thought I was incapable of any real harm and approached me with a grin. Two of them grabbed me and dragged me over to a darker area in the jungle, out of sight, then restrained me to a large tree. The main guy moved close to me, sliding his hands under my light steel breastplate. I felt the tears swelling in my eyes, I struggled to pull free but the two men were to strong. My heart raced faster and faster, my breath ran short and I felt a tear trickling down my cheek now. I could hardly speak. I didn’t want to fight back; I didn’t want to disappoint anyone. Would the officers even believe me if I told them?
No, I couldn’t let this happen. For once I had to give in to my reputation and do what I had to do. I took a deep breath and swiftly brought my knee up into the soldiers gut, knocking the breath out of him. The other two soldiers let me go immediately and ran over to help him. I rubbed my wrists, which were slightly bruised, then sent my elbow into each of the two men’s faces, knocking them out cold. I grabbed Mr. Badass by the neck and pulled him close to me; I could feel his warm breath on my face. He was wheezing, trying to free himself from the tight grip I had on his neck, but to no avail. “Listen closely and listen well, if you ever touch me again, I promise I will pop a bullet the size of my fist into your skull. Do you understand me?” I’d said to him. Fairly loud, too.
He nodded, still clutching at his chest and shaking quite a bit now. I smiled sweetly and gave him a tender kiss on the lips - then sent the butt of my rifle into the side of his face, spraying blood all over the foliage. I hated him.
Shortly after, Burely and several other officers showed up - as well as my other squad mates. The first thing that happened to me was a quick de-arming by some guards, and then I was bound and brought to the commanders’ tent to explain the situation. Yeah, for a first day, it was intense. I got off clean and several men were discharged that day though. Most of the others feared me now - it felt good. However, many also respected me now, treated like one of their own. And that felt better.
The rest of my time in the military was rather boring. We basically patrolled the camp all day, fending off few creatures and escorting Intel operatives back and forth. Although sometimes we did get into large fights, they were rather easy though. I began to loathe this job after a while, especially when I’d sit in my tent at night and hear the horses of great warriors ride by into the forest to unearth ancient tombs, level forsaken temples, and amass piles of treasure. I envied them; I wanted to leave the military to become a mercenary or whatever they were. But I knew it wouldn’t work out. Whenever the fogs of war blinded me from everything but my fallen comrade’s bodies and the vicious snarls of my foes just beyond my line of sight could be heard, I lost my cool. I was afraid, I wanted to drop my gear and run. Run forever, run home, run to my mother. I couldn’t though, I’d disappoint her and I was afraid of that. I was afraid of how the other soldiers would think of me. And all of this made me so confused, which made me angry.
I constantly nagged at officers to give us more exciting missions, something more intense and dangerous, but none of them listened to my pleas. I thought they had been ignoring me, but at the end of the month I was proven wrong as my entire platoon was informed that we’d be raiding a stronghold up north, in the Trogken Swamps. At first I thought it was a cruel joke, but they were very serious. And very insane. I’d heard stories of the swamps from travelers. Mysterious men in scuba gear walked mindlessly in the swamps, creatures of the muck would pull people under and devour them, and plants controlled by evil forces would strangle and intoxicate passerby. Very few left Trogken alive, most of them vowing never to return again. I wanted new assignments, true, but this was unbelievable.
We were shipped out that day, none of us questioning the orders received. We could see the pain in the officer’s eyes as they waved us off; we knew it was over. An Intel operative debriefed us on the mission: We’d infiltrate a stronghold deep within Trogken and retrieve a wealthy estate owner’s son, who was supposedly alive after three years of being missing. When I heard this, I wanted to get off the boat and leave right now. What were we to the general, disposable toys that we could do whatever with? Apparently we were; but it was too late and all of us were going to die.
I sat on the boat that night with everyone else in silence, writing this entry in my journal. Some of the men I’d come to know as the toughest people on this planet were crying on my shoulder. I tried to stay strong, to carry them as best I could, mainly because I felt guilty for getting us sent on this mission. If I’d have just done my job and not begged for a way to get my name out there, we’d be in the camp eating a large meal right now.
One thing plagued my mind terribly that night though, once again dealing with my reputation. How would we be remembered? Were we the brave and daring soldiers who sacrificed their lives to save another, or would people look at us as the gullible fools who walked right up to death and let it take them.
We arrived at the swamps late the next night, dark fog entombed us as we hopped off the boat into the murky waters. The air was warm and heavy; I heard thunder rolling in the distance and the wails of the hideous monsters within. I cocked my rifle, tightened my armor, and took a deep breath. I nodded towards the others, who were equally armed, and we began trotting off into the blackness. After a minute, we heard the boat leave the waters - we couldn’t even get home now. They didn’t even give us a chance. Many of the men looked back and a flurry of cusses rang throughout the swamp.
“Those bastards…”
Those were my final words before we were surrounded by swamp miners, who'd seemingly come from nowhere, and taken down without a chance to fight. None of us ever left the swamp, I almost wondered if anyone would remember us or know about us. Perhaps some great warrior will find this journal entry on my body and take it back to the common lands. In the end, when I looked back upon myself, I realized my idea to have a legendary reputation was my greatest sin. And I loathe myself more than anyone for that...
----- Hm, well - there she is. I actually like this piece more than most of my works, despite it being rather 'thrown' together. It has some sort of draw on me, but its not my feelings that I care about - its yours! Yes, leave me some comments, constructive criticism, and suggestions, even questions! I'd like to perfect this, so hit me with all you got! Hope you enjoyed reading it as much as I did writing it!
|
|
-
-
-
-
-
birpast
 
 - Joined on Mon, Jun 9 2008
- Texas
 - Points 540
|
Re: The Pains of Reputation
Very nice! ;D I followed the link on your siggy! I'm a little confused though, did she die in the end? Or was she captured? How did she write the ending of the journal? I hope she didn't die!
|
|
-
-
-
-
Shaden
- Joined on Sun, Dec 30 2007
- Hell on Earth...
- Points 3,977
|
Re: The Pains of Reputation
 GreyIscariot:Smashing job, i enjoyed it, really pulled me in, and was rather brought down by her death. I can't wait to read any more of your stories.
Thank you, glad you did! And yes, I usually write rather depressing endings, despite all the hate people aim at that. I'll definantly be putting more of my works up knowing that some more people read around here now!
Also, I read and commented your story as well, granted I was a bit harsher. :P
|
|
-
-
-
Ogrelord
- Joined on Wed, Feb 13 2008
- Maine
 - Points 8,218
|
Re: The Pains of Reputation
I am dumbfounded Shaden !!! This is by far the best written work around, although Onyx Fantasy's lost story will always be in my heart as a marvel tale, this however could even be used in the game. I am entrigued, I want to go to trogken and avenge Carmen. Touching, and enthralling story Shaden Bravo!!! Rest assured I will begin writing my stories again, and make this place more enjoyable. Oh and why did all of our rpgs, and past written works disappear? I didn't like that Onyx's and my stories were removed.
One day at a time, may be one day too late.
<g33k1337o7> thor is calling brice
<Ogrelord> calling?
<g33k1337o7> yeah
<Ogrelord> on the phone?
<g33k1337o7> yeah
<famey> yeah
<Ogrelord> sweet
<g33k1337o7> screaming out the window probably wouldn't work
<Ogrelord> lol
|
|
-
Page 1 of 1 (11 items)
|
|
|